The Higher Cost of “Unforgiveness”

All of us face hurts of many kinds. Others have threatened us, accosted us, betrayed our trust. We have faced loss and heartache. Sometimes we hold onto those events and they become touchstones in our lives that begin to define our response to the world around us. It’s one thing to forgive people when they are sorry and something else entirely to forgive someone who has become an enemy.

When Jesus washed his disciples’ feet he told Peter that unless he washed him, Peter could have no part with him. Jesus makes this connection of his service he performed for the twelve, in washing their feet, with the cleansing that he offers through the cross which must be received if we are to continue in a relationship with him. Jesus’ service to his disciples that evening was redemptive in that the cleansing he offered was especially needed since they would all run away. How would they have thought of Jesus' words and actions in retrospect when they came to believe in his resurrection?

But Judas was there also. Why did Jesus wash Judas’ feet? He knew that Judas would not return; he knew that he could not cleanse him and said as much (“you are clean, though not every one of you.”) Perhaps Jesus washed Judas’ feet because of what it did for himself. It was as much a redemptive act for his own sake as for the disciples. It was a way to bless his enemy and do good to the one who cursed him.

When we are hurt by others, our best course is to choose an active forgiveness. Unforgiven hurt leads to rejection of the perpetrator, but also to others who eventually become lumped into association with him/her. It leads to rebellion, retaliation, isolation and eventually a bitter life that rubs itself onto everyone around. Unforgiven hurt leaves the perpetrator in control.

When he washed Judas’ feet clean, I imagine Jesus wishing there was a way to break through and truly cleanse the dark heart of his betrayer. And when we find positive ways to approach our “enemies” we take a step forward in cleansing them as well – living in the likeness of Jesus.