Candy Coated

I don’t know if you are old enough to remember what life was like before Skittles, but I am. I also remember before they removed the red M&Ms because of fears about a certain red food coloring. Anyway, I am not a fan of Skittles; they are okay and my family loves them, but I am more of a chocolate man. I remember the first time I ate a Skittle, when they first came on the market – it wasn’t at all what I expected; actually, it kind of weirded me out. I expected candy covered chocolate that would melt in my mouth, not my hand, instead I got this sugary sweet and sour fruit burst.

I have been thinking about hypocrisy: What does a hypocrite look like? How can I know when I am being hypocritical? The word, hypocrite comes from the greek word for actor, but we would not call actors hypocrites just because of their occupation. I suppose we could think of a hypocrite as superficial, putting up a front that doesn’t really reflect what is deep inside.

Why would someone want to act like a disciple of God superficially, and withhold what is deep within from him? Does that make sense to you? It seems to me that there is very little benefit to looking like a Christian when you are not really (unless you are running for office.) I have noticed that the idea of hypocrisy in the New Testament is almost exclusively aimed at Jews. Now, I don’t believe that Jesus was picking on them in particular – he did spend most of his time with them – but they had the greatest incentive to be hypocrites about their true devotion to God. The other cultures that are represented in the Acts and the epistles were not saturated with believers so that there could be any benefit in acting like a follower. Instead the opposite is true, the believers had every worldly incentive to hide their faith and act like the world around them.

So hypocrisy might be something like a candy shell that covers the inconsistencies on the inside.

But in our culture, we have become so accustomed to corruption, immorality, self-promotion – there hardly seems to be any purpose for hiding it anymore. Why would someone go to the additional trouble to trying to look like a Christian when the inside simply is not devoted to that faith and lifestyle?

I wonder if you have any ideas about hypocrisy that can help us to be aware of its allure.

Jesus' Example of Suffering

The question of human suffering will always provide ammunition for unbelievers and questions for the faithful. In the movie, Shadowlands, and in his book, A Greif Observed, C. S. Lewis comes to deal firsthand with suffering after having lectured about it rather objectively for years. He had fallen in love with and married Joy Gresham only to lose her to cancer. Watching her courageously endure an agonizing death did not detract from his understanding of pain and suffering, but his objective knowledge had not fully prepared him for the intense feelings, questions, doubts, and fears that came upon him in his own personal suffering.

1 Peter 4 says that the result of suffering is that we do not live the rest of our earthly lives for human desires, but rather for the will of God. Now, I have suffered very little in this life, so I cannot pretend to fully understand this passage. Most of us have grown up privileged in that we have found access to everything we have needed almost every moment of our lives. For the most part we have also received more material blessings than we have been able to keep track of. Additionally, we have rarely, if ever, lived with fear for our own safety or our family’s. Our jobs have some security. Our economy is stable. Our place in this world has been an advantage for more than half a century. I can hardly understand the turmoil of those in Myanmar or Sichuan, China.

Even though I have suffered little, I can see the result of sin in my life and in our culture. Peter seems to indicate that is at least part of the suffering that leads us to turn toward God and away from the flesh. Perhaps we should make the time to reflect on the results of our pursuit of privilege and comfort – certainly Jesus did not follow that path: 1 Peter 4 starts by exhorting us to prepare ourselves to follow Jesus’ example of suffering so that we might be finished with sin. That is not often the way I have fought temptation when left to my own strategies.

The Humble Path

He was one of us
A man of the people
He surrounded himself with us all
Common folk
They listened; they received

He was not like us
A spiritual man
He retreated to the mountainside
Holy Father
He listened; he received

He was a part of us
A man of flesh
He walked a dirt trail
Simple man
Using the common; making the sacred

He was taken from us
A submissive man
He walked a lonely path
Silent lamb
Killing the sacred; making him common

He is the new us
A creating man
He opened a new door
Humble servant
Seeing the common, perceiving the sacred

Don Morrison
2008-05-20

Humility Or Humiliation

How can such similar thoughts be so very different? Both have to do with appearing “less than.” But the differences are many:

Humility is when someone is asked to take a back seat, and the person realizes that is not a reflection of his/her true value. It is the belief that by taking a lesser role and serving the roles of others we are imitating the character of God and advancing His kingdom by faith. Humiliation is the feeling a person may have when they are asked to take the back seat.

Humility is a decision; the ability to set aside feelings and think less of oneself than of others; to be aware of their needs and attentive to them instead of merely thinking of one’s own desires or needs. Humiliation is a mixture of feelings that can produce a variety of behaviors: anger may lead to retaliation, shame may lead to isolation, embarrassment may produce retaliation, defensiveness that stems from pride, or even humility that reflects a greater concern for others who are involved.

Humility costs in advance: it must be exercised daily for it to gain any strength in one’s life. It pays in arrears: one reason we use it so little is because the benefits are not always clear and they almost always go unnoticed by others. Humility is closely related to meekness and so is often seen by others as weakness. Humiliation costs in the moment and later, but our reaction to our humiliation can make a difference to the cost – self-control and graciousness toward others (both of which are produced by humility) can actually pay more than the cost.

Jesus chose to exercise humility long before his public humiliation. (cf. Philippians 2:1-11, John 5:31-47) It was his mastery of humility that allowed him to humbly say, “Father forgive them.”

Moms Can Do That

Of course she gave me life, yet it is difficult to imagine my mother carrying me. King David imagined himself being knit together in his mother’s womb by the wonder of God’s creative power. My mother had just turned twenty-three a month before giving birth to yours truly, having already given birth to my older brother . When I turned 23, I was looking forward to graduation and marrying Donna – I had not yet found my first ministry. I was only beginning to learn about life and responsibility at the age when mom was already raising 2 children. But it’s not how young she was that makes her special to me, it’s how she loved me and cared for me – and still does.

Mom’s get away with things most of us would never allow anyone else to think about. Mom would take a tissue out of her purse and wet it to wipe some smudge from my childish face. Not many people could do that, but mom could. She could tell her friends some embarrassing story on me while sitting around the kitchen table. Of course I would be self-conscious, but who can stop a mother from telling stories on her children? Mom’s can make you hug them when you’re in front of your teenage friends – and while they have their arms around you, they’ll place a wet kiss on your cheek and give you all sorts of motherly instructions (for which your teenaged friends are certainly grateful) like, don’t drive too fast, or stay out too late, or go to some place not pre-approved by mom.

I truly felt ashamed of those expressions of love. They seemed so juvenile, when I felt so grown-up. But now, when I see some young mother tenderly loving her unhappy and unappreciative child, I often think of how my own mother cherished me when I was the squirming, complaining, unhappy one. I knew I was loved, but I didn’t see it up close in those moments.

Maybe that’s a little like Peter saying to Jesus, You’re not going to wash my feet! To which Jesus replied, “If I don’t wash you, you have no part with me.” Mom would have said, “Get over here; I’m your mother.”

Thank you, Mom. And thank you, God, for moms.

(I realize that not everyone has a mom worthy of honor, but I must honor my own.)