I have been thinking of those words from Ephesians 5:21 every day this month; I have prayed over them and wondered how to practice submission on a daily basis.
Submission is not something you can “muscle-through.” There are some behaviors one can adopt, and it would definitely be possible to appear submissive under certain circumstances, but that sort of cuts against the grain of submission.
I have tried to submit myself to Donna in our marriage relationship, but we have been married, going on 27 years – our patterns of behavior are deeply rooted. Any changes I make to myself may be noticed, but they are hardly concrete until they have been practiced for some length of time. And I have tried to be giving of myself in that relationship for most of those 26 years.
I have tried to submit myself in relationship to my children as well. But they are children and not peers so that kind of submission doesn’t always look like submission. It may look so when I forfeit the television or something out of deference to them, but not when I am grounding my daughter from her cell phone. Yet they are the same inside me.
I have tried to submit myself to my brothers and sisters, to people I meet, to my parents…I feel less righteous than before, not because of my behavior, but because I feel as though I am missing something that is essential and I don’t know what it is.
Thoughts, suggestions, critiques?
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2 comments:
Don,
You've blogged about being submissive in your actions. I am curious about your experience in submitting in your feelings and emotions. Often times we talk about submission as a way to free us from the need to be in control. Your sermon included a section on this. I've been thinking about how my own emotions control me. Have you had any experiences in submission freeing you from emotions or feelings such as anger, perceived injustice, irritation, or feelings of inward rebellion during an outward act of submission. Just curious if you had any experiences with this aspect of submission.
Matt
Thanks Matt,
You are right to direct my attention inward. That is why submission is not something one can muscle through. Yet as I go through this month of focus, I realize that, unlike gratitude - which creates very quick differences in oneself and others - submission is slow acting/time release. And others really are not apt to notice it very much. The reward is that of seeking God. It is a secret between him and me. Submission can hardly be a group venture.
I think it may not be something missing, as I had said in my post, rather it is the expectation of something that should not be expected. Submission does not overtly affect others so there is no immediate feedback.
I am interested in your thoughts.
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